WERE YOU INVITED?
Welcome to the only speakeasy inspired smile lounge known to man.
We pour confidence like illegal cocktails served in the shadows.
We craft new smile identities behind closed doors and get you drunk in love with your smile again.
They say we're not supposed to exist, and you shouldn't be here
But, now that you are... Enter Quietly and Indulge Loudly.
This is where ordinary smiles die and neck breaking smiles are born.
IN SMILES WE TRUST.
BY INVITATION ONLY
THE WHISPERS IN OUR WIND...
"My smile should NOT look this good for the price I paid. And the experience was so dope. Lock me up repeatedly, please."
( NEW MEMBER OF TSSS)
Sneek Peak at our:
SMILE COCKTAILS
THE GUEST MENU
Can you give it to me
"ON THE ROCKS"?
The best cocktails are served with ICE. Shaken, Stirred, Stacked and Sparkling. It's about to be a COLD winter in your mouth.
THE GUEST MENU
I'd like to take my
FIRST SIP?
Before we pour you anything stronger, let's get a slow, dangerous look at what your smile can become. Proceed carefully for this consult.
THE GUEST MENU
Make that a
DIRTY
MARTINI, PLEASE.
You filthy animal! *eye wink* Our most notorious smile cocktail. An unforgiving cosmetic cleaning that leaves no evidence of your naughty behavior.
THE GUEST MENU
What's your finest
SPARKLING
CHAMPAGNE?
When you're about to change ya smile, you pop champagne! Poured Boldly with whitening notes bright enough to blind your enemies...One Pour onto your teeth and you'll be accused of "Intent to Shine".
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LOOKING FOR OUR SECRET MENU?
And our Private, Lower, Off The Grid Pricing?
And our In House Financed Payment Plans?
And our Priority Booking?
And our Membership App?
And our After Hours Reservation Slots
And Warranties on Your Services?
And Cash for your Referrals?
And FREE Consultations too?
Join The Secret Smile Society.
CLASSIFIED DISCLAIMER
The Smile Crimes Division is a fictional brand experience created to make smile care an unboring experience.
We are not affiliated with any real-world agency or law enforcement department.Thee Jewelry Bar & Smile Lounge is a real smile office, fully operating and have been since 2019.
Your smile is the only thing under investigation here.